I do a lot of people watching, especially on vacations. Vacations can be miserable...apparently. We just got back from a week long cruise with family and friends. For me, it was a great time. So many people on a boat filled with plenty to do, great food, sunshine, and no work! But it didn’t seem as though they were relaxed and stress free.

I remember when we took our children to Disney years ago. Disney is said to be the “happiest place on earth”. Well, it wasn’t the week we went. Everywhere we went, we saw parents yelling and screaming at their kids, kids running out of control with no supervision and fathers with a look on their face saying they’ve had enough. No one looked as though they were happy.

I believe there’s a huge difference between happiness and joy. Happiness is temporary and can be found in food, drink, a hobby, money, and even a job promotion. Joy is eternal and can only be found in a savior, Jesus Christ. There’s a big difference. When your joy is coming from an eternal being, it’s just that, eternal. Nothing around you whether circumstances or people can take it away. It’s deep inside you. You can still be sad, down or even depressed but the external cause of this joy, Jesus Christ, is ever present, always there for you and always loving you. It changes everything. Without Him, everything can easily affect us, even when we’re relaxing on a beach in the beautiful sunshine.

Happiness depends on things that happen, joyfulness is never touched by external conditions. Joy means the perfect fulfillment of that for which I was created, not the successful doing of a thing.

One of the most fascinating books of the Bible for me has always been Ecclesiastes which was written by one of the smartest and richest people ever, Solomon. He speaks of having everything he could ever want(riches, wisdom, fame, etc) and all of it was “like chasing the wind.” Ecclesiastes 1:14 “I observed everything going on under the sun, and really, it is all meaningless-like chasing the wind.”

I love this quote from William B. Girao. “Live in such a way that even if given another opportunity to live your life all over again, you would still choose to live it exactly the same way that you are living your life now.”

Where are we finding our happiness and how long is it lasting? There is something out there that is eternal and will bring joy to you that’s unexplainable and will last forever. The good news is this “something” is someONE who is pursuing you and wants nothing more than for you to feel this joy. All you have to do is say yes to Him. It’s not a religion, it’s a relationship.

Honored to hear from a good friend of mine regarding going through storms in our lives. Please give it a read:

I am writing this now as I stand in the middle of one of the worst storms of my life. I awake every morning knowing that this storm has ever so much more fury to cast upon me and my life and I also know that I am not alone in this. Every day millions are facing a furious storm in their life and for many they do not see a way out of it, being cast hither and thither. How do I possibly survive this?

This world is not an easy place to live and there are some things that can cause disruption and destruction in our lives. (2 Timothy 3:2-5) These are situations we read about every day in the news, violence, shootings, drugs. All destructive forces roaring into peoples lives. I never thought to be involved in the middle of one of these destructive forces and yet here I stand facing another furious storm.  No one ever said life would be easy!

Still this time it is different!!!

I lost my wife to cancer four years ago and I felt my life was over. I had no one or nowhere to turn until our Lord and Father showed mercy to me and brought me into His loving embrace. That first storm nearly cost me my life as its raging fury left me nowhere to turn. I was lost and alone and all that I felt was important in life was no longer there. All else was just a material useless item that could bring me no pleasure and even worse, no relief from the pain. Sometimes we must lose everything to realize what is truly of import. Now mind you my reader, in no way do I wish this to befall even one person as this is not an easy storm from which to emerge. I was only able to find my way because My Savior opened His arms and I followed his shining light of hope out of it.

Now the storm is upon me once more and again it is blowing with savage fury, trying once more to rip my life apart. Imagine my shock to find out that my beloved daughter is a heroin addict at 28 years of age. We were not supposed to be in this storm. This was one of those things that happens to other people. I was so naïve, now so full of grief and bursting with tears. My heart is sore! 

There is a difference though this time my friends. A huge difference! This time I have the love and comfort of being upheld by the power of His love and grace and that makes ALL the difference in the world. My Savior and His Father stand ever ready to hold onto me, to give me strength, to embrace me as I cry a million tears. So many times in our lives these storms will burst upon us, unbidden and ready to bring us to ruin. We can never be prepared for every one of these for the world has so little to offer and even less support to give.  Our God allows these storms to test our faith and resolve knowing that at any point there could come another even fiercer hurricane, tornado, blizzard ever ready to rip us apart. (James 1:12; Galatians 6:9; Hebrews 10:34-35)

So I stand in the middle of the fury only because my Lord and King is bolstering me with His love, grace and strength. Without Him I would be lost! Without my church I would be lost! Without the love and support from my wife and my fellow brothers and sisters at Fellowship, I would be lost! (1 Corinthians 12:24-26) I write this not to ask for pity or sympathy. This is not about just me. This is about all of us. I write this to inspire each and every one to draw close to the Father and His son. “Draw close to God and He will draw close to you.” There is no other way you can stand through any storm without Christ as your Savior, without his grace and his strength. You cannot do this alone. I cannot do this alone. We cannot do this alone. We DON’T have to face this alone!!!! 

Could you say this??? Are you keeping close to Christ and his Father? Are you praying incessantly? Are you in His word, soaking up His love and strength? Are you preparing yourself for any storm that will test your faith? Any little trial that tries to disrupt our life can become a raging and furious storm. Are you prepared enough to face that storm, standing firm, relying on Father to guide you through the darkness?

The storm is raging and I am not alone! 

I believe we witness affairs everyday.

Affairs are not just physical. Having a deeper emotional connection with anyone other than your spouse can be a form of adultery.

When that person ends up having more of your heart than your significant other, things get dangerous.

I believe there are many forms of adultery. Anything that takes you from your spouse can be seen as a red flag.

The “red flags” I see today are completely different from years ago.

1. Hobby Obsession: When your spouse is upset regarding the amount of time you spend doing something there’s time for a discussion. Some examples of these may be:
     Social Media (Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, even Pinterest)
     If your significant other claims you’re on it too much, chances are you may be.

     Video games
     Do you disappear for hours getting entranced in a make believe world while your spouse holds it all together?

     TV
     Do you watch your own shows every night and avoid your spouse?

     Sports                                                                                                  Are you a great golfer? Great softball player? If so, what’s your family life look like? Being a good golfer or softball player takes a lot of practice. Is this taking away from your home life?

2. Work Spouse: Are you sharing too much with a co-workers? What would your spouse think if they heard all the conversations? Today males and females work together more than ever. Men and women are asked to meet together one on one for coffee or go on business trips together. As a married couple, we need to set boundaries.

3. Lust

Matthew 5:27-28 says,”You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
What are you looking at daily? What is pornography to you? Is the Victoria’s Secret catalog considered pornography? How about the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue? What are you thinking about when you look at these? How much the bathing suit is? Probably not.
I think all of these are important to talk over with your spouse.
Proverbs 6:27 Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned?
I think not.

29Jan

Is It A SIN?

Is it a sin to only put a dollar on the Powerball? Can I drink 2 beers? Can my girlfriend do this as long as we’re NOT doing that?

Working at a church, we get these questions all the time. I read the following profound story the other day that can help guide people with the answers like these:

There was once a guy who owned a small trucking firm, and was looking to employ a new driver. Three drivers sat nervously outside his office as they were called in for their interview one by one. When the first guy came out, the other two checked with him, “What did he ask you?”. The man replied, “He only asked one question. How close could I safely drive one of his trucks near the edge of a cliff.” “What did you say?”“I said I could get one of his trucks to within 3 meters of the edge, but I don’t think my answer was good enough.”The second man went in, and was asked the same question.He answered “I could get one of your trucks within one meter of the edge.” But apparently that wasn’t good enough either.Finally, the last driver went in. The boss looked at him and asked the question.The man replied, “If I were driving one of your trucks, I wouldn’t go anywhere near the edge of a cliff!” He got the job.

Why do we, as followers of Jesus Christ, continue to “drive so close to the edge” in things that can lead us to actually falling off? We are so confident in our ability to stop something before it gets out of hand yet see examples daily of someone who couldn’t or didn’t.

Proverbs 6:27-28 says. Can a man scoop a flame into his lap  and not have his clothes catch on fire? Can he walk on hot coals and not blister his feet?

“I can have one more drink, I can be alone with my girlfriend on a couch with the lights dim and nobody’s home, I can afford to buy all these lotto tickets because when I win….”

None of the above is necessarily sin. but should we putting ourselves in scenarios that can lead to it?

Paul says in Romans 7:21, I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong.

I can relate to that verse with my life story! Oh, how I wish I set boundaries in my life and didn’t “dip my toe” in some of these areas when I was younger.

James 1:14-15  “but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.”

Sounds dangerous. Ask anyone who has been in trouble at all where it all started. Most will tell you a story of them “dipping their toe” into something they shouldn’t have and things escalated from there.

James 4:7 says,”So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” I know it sounds dramatic but it’s so true.

Surround yourself with people who will protect you from bad decisions. (Good time to sign up for a Growth Group at FC!) Go to God’s Word and learn how to set up boundaries to avoid future problems. Pray to God that He will protect you and give you the wisdom to do the right things. Are you driving near the edge of any cliffs today? Any behaviors or circumstances you need to change?