Every single one of us are on a journey. Some are on the 'fast-track' while others are 'pacing themselves'. 

What I’ve learned along the way is that I really am the ‘pace car’. I control the speed of my own journey, not anyone else. In my effort to grow closer to God throughout the years I’ve seen my pace change too often. 

But here’s what I learned along the way that changed me:

• What I put in I get out (reap what you sow) If I want to grow closer with God, I need to spend time with Him. In any relationship (marriage, friendship, dating), in order to get closer, you have to spend time with them. James 4:8 says, “Come close to God, and God will come close to you.” Spending time with God comes in different forms. We pray to Him. We read His Word (the Bible). We spend time with other believers either on Sundays at church or a small group or coffee with a friend. Whatever it is that you do, it’s all important. 

• Church can only do so much– If our connection to God is only on Sundays, we may be in trouble. When we put that type of pressure on a church or a pastor to be the only “God” we’re getting weekly, we will fail miserably. The staff of the church hope that we are inspiring you to follow Him on your own as well. We are praying that you are scheduling your time with Him daily. Don’t just ‘fit Him in” when you can. I've never just found extra time at the end of the day. Put your daily time with God on your calendar. If you need to, set an alarm to go off to remind you. Get an accountability partner to push you to read scripture with them. Do a plan on YouVersion.com with a friend. Pray each night with your spouse or family. Make Him part of your routine. 

• Get involved– God has created you to be a doer. James 2:17 says, “So you see, faith by itself isn’t enough. Unless it produces good deeds, it is dead and useless. He has created in you a divine potential. Too many of us are a bit too comfortable. But being uncomfortable leads to growth. Every time I have to lead a group, speak on a Sunday, meet with someone I don’t know that well, or learn some new system, I’m completely uncomfortable. But when it’s over, I’m different. God teaches you most in these uncomfortable moments. 

How’s your journey going? Are you moving up and to the right, or are you ‘flat lining’? What will it take for you to truly get closer to God?

It'll take you. It starts with YOU. As we’ve said so often here at FC, you are ridiculously more in control of your life than you think. Today, decide to allow God to shape your journey by spending time with Him.

GUEST BLOGGER: Randy Sarno

Most people realize addiction comes in many forms such as overindulgence in alcohol or drugs, gambling, or porn. However, addiction can also come from activities that start out as a hobby. Things that at first are something to take your mind off the busyness of this world. A routine pastime that builds and consumes not just your time but your thoughts. Some examples are an obsession with your job, sports, binge watching, or social media. Chances are you may have had an addiction and did not even notice it unless stated by a loved one or close friend. Past and present relationships can be damaged by taking the "me" time to satisfy our addictions.  

There are many different help groups for many different addictions but as children of Christ we know our strength is not just our own. We need to put God first right in front of our steps and walk the straight path. We need to find scripture powerful to our current state so that we can "be still" (Psalm 46:10), know that "the Lord is my strength" (Exodus 15:12), and understand "anything is possible if a person believes" (Mark 9:23). 

Anyone who has seen me around the church in a t-shirt will notice me by my pjs, what i refer to as my pre-Jesus tattoos. I have gone through many addictions to fill holes in my life mentally and spiritually. They have never worked and I have driven away many relationships to continue those actions. Recently I gave up and put my life into God and from that feel like I am for the first time starting to succeed. I am not motivated to get worldly tasks done in such a manner that I forget about others and now delight in spending time in discussions with chance encounters I was never open to before. I am at peace and accomplish so much more while taking the focus off myself. Instead I try to spread joy to those in my life.

My priority each day is moving closer to the word through reading scriptures. I wake each morning with a prayer of thanksgiving and to focus my mind and heart in the direction Jesus would go. I get ready and take a morning walk while only using my phone to read devotionals and scripture from a bible app. I use Youversion and welcome anyone to create an account, become friends, and create a plan to share in the discussion. My radio is set to K-LOVE and at work I stream pastor podcasts. I try to devote time to reading published works that will bring me closer to knowing more about God each day. I am much more into serving others and helping in ways that I am capable. 

My prayer through this short blog is that the Holy Spirit will stir inside you pushing you to follow the Word more closely. I pray you break the addictions that are consuming your life. I pray for you all because I love you all but Jesus loves you even more. Please if you know anyone who is struggling reach out to them lovingly as a true friend. "a triple-braided cord is not easily broken" (Ecclesiastes 4:12). Find your strength in Christ and he will be that third sturdy braid. Thank you for taking a few moments to read these words.

We all need to be inspired. 

One of the reasons I love my job so much is that I get inspired all the time from the people of this church. I have countless examples of people doing things that truly encourage and motivate me. They also strengthen my faith. Based on the fact that the people I speak of are not mentioned by name is because honestly they’d probably feel very uncomfortable. (They’re not very comfortable with praise.) That may be another reason why I love them so much and are inspired by them. So here is a list that is never ending. The stories keep coming.

I’m inspired by:

1. The lady from our church that despite dealing with agoraphobia (fear of leaving their house) for more than 2 years decided to step out, come to church, then go public and be baptized. The baptism, in turn, inspired2 others to do the same!
2. A young lady here who despite countless health issues, where the pain and fatigue is unbearable, sings beautifully on Sundays preparing the hearts of those attending to hear from God.  She inspiresso many of us, never complaining and always praying.
3. The couple that despite the difficult season they are in, asks others to pray for them and their marriage. Their transparency and clear effort to get better is inspiring. You can’t fix fake! 
4. A lady that gives countless hours to the teens at our Living Proof environment and the children of Vacation Bible Camp. She knows every teen by name. She knows what they’re all going through. She listens to them and they absolutely love her. #Teenwhisperer. She tirelessly sets up for VBC with her team. She’ll often say she didn’t go 'all out' but when we see it each year, we wonder what ‘all out’ could possibly mean with her. It’s always next level and all of us look at it inspired!
5. The couple who serve in every environment and always wonder why everyone wouldn’t want to do this. They see their growth in Christ moving each time they (like Christ) serve. 
6. The lady who who first brought her daughters to the ‘LP Mess Fest’ last year and actually returned! She now brings them every week. 2 weeks ago she went from a daughter’s dance practice to church to the other daughter’s soccer practice! She still fit church in. She gets it. That is inspiring! 

Here’s the thing. I have so many more. 

I can go on and on. I actually left out my wife, my mother-in-law and our staff. They have inspired me all along. I am beyond blessed to be inspired daily by the people I get to do life with.

Who are you inspired by? Who are you inspiring? People are watching!  

Some of the greatest men I know

Most of us will not forget this year's Warrior Conference. I'm still on cloud nine thinking of all that God did over the weekend. Our biggest prayer each year is for men to grow closer to Christ and to have better relationships with others. I truly believe this was accomplished. In fact, one of the highlights of the weekend was spotting five FC men huddled together praying. Five men, by the way, who didn't even know each other the day before. It was in this moment where I knew God was steering the ship. 

Our favorite spot

I am chosen, not forsaken. I am who You say I am

The teaching was great. The biggest thing I took from the weekend was that Warriors ask for help. We’re all in some level of rehab.  We cannot do it alone. We had 30 plus men in a room after one of the sessions pouring out their heart with a commitment to be better, to fully surrender, and to do life with fellows warriors. 

Pre-hike, hence the smiles

We continued our annual hike tradition (one might call it more of a trek) where many of us pushed through the soreness and fatigue. At some of the peaks, we would have a push up and a one-arm push up contests (to feed our egos). It is a men's conference. We also continued our 'fight club' but that's really all I can say about that. 

What happens at Warrior Conference stays at Warrior Conference

Men - If you have never attended a Warrior Conference, mark your calendars for next year (May 30th-June 1st) You will be glad you did. 

I had a tough month recently. I was super busy, anxious and a bit stressed. Many people close to me were dealing with health issues including my wife who was in the process of donating her kidney. I only see that now in retrospect. Thinking back on it now, I think I could have handled the month a bit better.  The super busy months that make us anxious, are always inevitable. It will help to be better prepared for them. 

Being in ministry is like nothing I ever imagined. The highs and lows can be daily. In one moment, a good friend of yours in getting married while in another, someone is diagnosed with cancer. People get new jobs, while others are losing their job. A child gets accepted to a great college, while another child drops out of school. Someone starts attending church every week, someone disappears. The highs and lows, they are never ending. 

Over the years in ministry, and thinking back on this month of craziness that I just had, I have learned some valuable lessons.  Here two things that can help you handle the ups and downs that come your way:

• THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP
  Late in the month that I was stressed, I happened to be meeting with a couple of great guys during the week and I learned something very valuable. I NEEDED THEM. These meet ups weren't strategically planned but God worked it out. I needed the encouragement, love and genuine friendship they were showing me in that moment. It changed my perspective as I left each one of them. I felt better and better. Meeting with these friends during this crazy week taught me how much I need refreshment. That's what I received from them. 
   
• THE POWER OF PRAISE
  If you're like me, the negative can sometimes drown out the positive. The unanswered prayers can be more memorable than the answered ones. The cynicism can defeat the optimism. What I've learned from this personality trait of mine was perspective. As I really look at all that is going on, I learned to hold more tightly to the incredible amount of blessings, answered prayers and WINS in my life. Each week I get to be a part of life change in other's lives. I get to witness people accepting Jesus Christ into their lives and being forever different. I see a crowd of people making an effort each Sunday to 'do better'. I see 'up and to the right' in action each week. I see people coming into the church and leaving better. That's something to hold on to. That's something to celebrate! That's something to never forget. 

So I ask you 2 questions: 

1. Do you have people around you that encourage and inspire you? Are there people who you meet with and you leave different? Better mood, better demeanor and better altogether? 
2. Do you see all that is good in this world, or are you holding on to all of the bad? Is your cup full or are you wondering if there even is a cup? Are you seeing all God has done or are you wondering if He is actually paying attention? Is your life full of prayer requests or praises? (I'm breathing this morning...praise God!)

Our life has everything to do with who we are hanging out with and our perspective. Grab hold of some really good friends who, when you meet with them, you always leave better. Grab hold of a perspective of gratitude. Praise God for the easily overlooked things like living in America, good health, and your family and even the small things like "Thank you Lord that I woke up this morning." 

“Why is it important for the Church to invest in youth?”

A question like this is generally an easy one for anyone to answer and most people typically agree with it. However, I hear it posed and I immediately begin bracing for the inevitable response, “Youth are the future of the church.” Often, my internal reaction is an eye-roll and sigh. It’s not that this answer is wrong. It’s just that being the future of the church is only one small part of the answer to this question. My response is that “The youth are the NOW of the church.” 

This is why Youth Ministries exists. This is why Fellowship has Momentum on Sundays for middle school and has a youth group called Living Proof on Wednesdays for both middle and high school students. We value and understand the importance of teenagers encountering  Jesus at their level. 

As both a Youth Pastor and human being that was once a teenager, (not that long ago), I advocate for attending a youth group. Yeah, student ministry has its flaws, believe me; I can give you a list. But, student ministry provides so many positives for a teenager’s life, faith, and future. The thing is…in today’s culture both parents/students view a youth group as an elective. This means that if homework, sports, being tired, practice, fill in the blank, don’t conflict then both students and their parents might consider attending a youth-group. Don’t get me wrong, most parents want their teenager to be in a community with peers who believe what they believe where they learn Godly values, have fun, and build relationships. But when the teenager may have no interest or is “too busy”… it’s left at that. 

Also, not every student who doesn’t attend ‘youth group’ at their church is neglecting spiritual growth or involvement. I would say that what ultimately determines the spiritual growth and outcome for most teens is the spiritual health and pattern of the family, not their participation in youth group. If faith, following Jesus, and being in community is a priority for you, there is a high chance it will be for your teenager, if not now then in the future. What I will argue for is being engaged in a student ministry provides more opportunities for a teenagers friends to come to know Jesus. Using a student ministry as a strategy to reach the lost is just one reason teenagers need it. Let me share with you a few other reasons why student ministry is important:

Teenagers need community.

We cannot underestimate the influence of our friends. You are the sum of your five closest friends - how they act, talk, and believe. To be honest, my friends were one of reasons I kept my faith as a teenager. I had so many friends that I met at church and my youth group who made such a positive impact on my faith. In return, it enabled me to have a positive impact on them, and my friends who didn’t know Jesus came to know him . It was in my youth group where I learned how to serve, how to lead, and how to make my faith my own. And it was that much easier and more effective because I had the support of my friends around me.

Teenagers need a safe place to be vulnerable.

Few places like that exist in this world. If you take a look around, there aren’t too many places where a young person can safely test their independence, be trusted with legitimate leadership roles, and follow good mentors. At church a teenager can truly be themselves. At church a teenager can make mistakes in an environment designed to help them get up and try again.

Teenagers need a greater purpose.

Teenagers long to be part of something bigger than them. Sports, bands, and clubs have capitalized on this longing for decades. Teenagers have a greater passion and imagination than any other age group. After all, most of Jesus disciples began following Jesus as teenagers, and they ended up changing the world. Showing a teenager what following Jesus looks like taps into something deep within their souls and being in a student ministry creates opportunities for them to serve their peers. A student ministry invests in youth because its aim is to create leaders that are well-rounded, experienced, trustworthy, and unique.

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These are just a few reasons and I could go on. The bottomline is that as Fellowship’s Student Pastor I want to do anything I can to help the faith journey of a teenager. Whether you are a parent, a grandparent, aunt/uncle, young adult, single, or married, my challenge to you is to encourage teenagers to get involved in the church. The question is not so much, “Why is it important for the Church to invest in youth,” but “Why is it important for our youth to invest in the Church.” If you have any questions about our Student Ministries or if you’re interested in serving in Living Proof or Momentum, feel free to contact me! 

Email: Ross@fellowshipchurchct.com

The word "membership" today means belonging to a select club. Everyone uses the term including credit cards, AAA, AARP and fitness clubs. It's kind of gotten a bad rap. I know this from working at a fitness club for over 20 years where in order to cancel, you need to send a certified letter 30 days in advance of your last billing, a blood sample and your firstborn....ok, just the certified letter. It's way too difficult, at times, to end a membership!

We feel that church should be different. Our belief is that every Christian should belong to a local church and take "ownership" of that church. This includes serving, giving, and participating in biblical community. It's a process. Some jump right on while others take their time. I, for one, took my time. It took me a couple of years before I did anything but I still felt welcomed. I was never rushed into serving. Nobody ever pressured me. Ultimately it was me reading God's Word that convinced me, not those at the church (although they were very encouraging).

1 Peter 4:10 God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.

In a perfect church (yes, there's no such thing!) people, much like Jesus, would come TO SERVE, not to be served. Mark 10:45 For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others. We have a shared cause, a shared mission. Our ultimate goal here is to introduce this community to Jesus Christ. Once you make this HUGE decision for your life to become a follower of Christ, there comes with it expectations. It's written throughout the Bible. We are not called to "sit on our hands". There are responsibilities. We, here at Fellowship Church, want all of you to love this church so much that you really take "ownership" of it. This means you do anything you can to make people feel welcome, to help make our church look good for those coming here for the first time and to intentionally seek and help out others in their journey. Membership is the difference between, "That's the church I go to" to "That's my church.". 

In our Membership class on May 6th 11:45AM to 2:00PM, we will be going over our core values, our beliefs, our history and our vision. We will have lunch and provide free childcare as well. We really hope you join us and help us make a big difference here in this community. Take ownership of your church and sign up HERE. Together we can change this community!

                    Did you ever watch the show “Super Nanny?” When my children were small I remember my wife and I watching that show trying to soak in all of the tips on how NOT to raise a brat.  We watched one episode where a 6-year old child is yelling at her dad to "Give me my toy back!" and the frustrated father yells back, "Give me my life back!" I remember laughing but I also remember feeling bad for each. (On a side note, I'm so glad all of my parenting moments have not been on camera.)                                                                

                   I tend to believe that the measurement of your parenting can only be made when your children are in their upper teens, early 20's. When I see this age group doing well, being respectful, well-mannered and reliable, I immediately think of what a great job the parent(s) did. This is the timeframe where it all comes to fruition, where all of the discipline they enforced and the love they shared becomes evident. This is where they can exhale (just a bit). *For the record, this is not always the case. Some great parents have had some really difficult kids. It's not the end all.

                    I talk to people all the time about parenting. No parent of the 1970's can teach all there is to know to the parents of the 20(teens). It's very different. Parents in the 70's were concerned with very different things than this generation of parenting is. Although when we hear of kids in the front seat, candy cigarettes, no sun screen, parts (see below), drinking from a hose and no seat belts, maybe we really shouldn't be listening to them anyway.

                  Today, for me as a parent, I'm most concerned with this media exposure. I'm sure most of you are as well. I feel as though we really will not know the damage all of these will create in our children until it's too late. I see kids all the time with free unlimited access to different media outlets (Snapchat, Instagram, YouTube, etc.) They look up things on Google (sometimes not good things). Some of them see images we didn't see until we were in our 20's (or ever!). Each image is shaping them. Some are images that create a desire for more images, and so on and so on. I remember a while back when my daughter was into gymnastics. She was looking at videos on YouTube of some of these and I saw from over her shoulder on the right of the screen some "recommended videos". One was titled something along the lines of 'gymnastics gone wrong' where someone either breaks a leg or gets hurt in some capacity. Thankfully I was there and she didn't see an image that would've taken a while (maybe never) to erase from her brain. 

EPHESIAN 6:4 Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline and instruction that comes from the Lord.

                 I really don't know how I'm doing as a parent right now. I do see a lot of weaknesses but one of them is not the passivity of media use. We have strict rules at home in regards to this. It doesn't mean they haven't seen things they shouldn't have with other friends or in other atmospheres. We do our best but I can't be with them at school functions, sporting or recreational events, friend's houses for parties or on the bus. (This is where they have shared with me some of the stuff others are looking at) I can't control everything but I do know one way in which all of you as parents of younger kids can help: Set up some real strict guidelines on access to these media outlets! Try doing this, you will help my wife and I, along with many other parents! Instead of hearing how "my friend 'so and so' gets to bring her iPhone everywhere and has Snapchat and Instagram", I'd love to hear, "Yes, my friend doesn't have an iPhone either and is not allowed to have an account" It would be a lot easier for us to parent without the comparisons and the "it's not fair" conversations.

                 I know this is not easy. In fact, some of you will say it's 'too late in the game'. Your kids have an Instagram account that they will tell you they can't close because their friend (who they see every day) will wonder what they're up to. The friends are eagerly awaiting the next filtered selfie. They won't be able to talk to you until tomorrow! 

                I don't think it's too late. I think it's a great time to start. It comes with a conversation. A conversation clearly communicating that this decision is because you love them not because you love hearing, "I'm bored." 

Any advice here? I would love to hear it. Comment below or email me Rich@fellowshipchurchct.com